Solo travelling and …life
A few weeks ago, I really needed time away from everything. I was craving nature time, walking, cycling, spending time on my own with my journal and books.
I really needed the space for myself. I wanted to be in stillness, clarify my thoughts or rather hear myself better and listen to myself, intuition or whatever you wanna call it.
Maybe this might sound weird to you, especially if you’ve never travelled solo?
For my solo buddies, I know you can relate to this.
Whoever I met in my trip asked the same questions or a variation of:
“Are you travelling alone? Why?”
Let’s just put it out there, in case it still needs to be said:
Travelling by yourself is normal, so is travelling with others and you should do whatever the heck your soul desires.
Even when you’re travelling by yourself, you’re never alone, you’re with yourself and you meet people on the way.
I ventured on a bike ride which apparently no one does as people prefer to use a motorcycle or a car for this specific part. Because it was inside Kirirom Park in Cambodia and the journey is a little bit uphill, to put it nicely.
A few km in my bike rider, after being warned by various local people, it become blatantly obvious why!
I was pushing the pedal to the metal on this hill which didn’t seem that hilly to me wheezing loudly throughout the process. Oh, the irony!
I am not gonna make myself look good here… I was totally cheering myself on, even got off the bike and walked next to it when my legs gave way and the jumped back on it after a break. At some point, completely wheezing whilst laughing and cursing all at the same time, heard myself saying out loud:
“You got this, one step at the time.” “See where’s almost there”, “Wow we did 6km already, fuck yea”
(for reference: I do this all the time, especially through challenging workouts haha…if you’ve never tried it, give it a go, you might like it!)
Then it suddenly hit me!
This is the perfect analogy to life.
Because, at times, the challenge ahead of us doesn’t seem so challenging. The local people tried to tell me it’s steep and no one cycles it but in my typical stubborn fashion, I mean — I like a good challenge! — I decided let’s try… and try it was!
Just like life.
Sometimes we embark on a journey with excitement without really knowing what to expect, how it will change us, how it will push us or who we will become in the process. And those typically are the best kind of journeys for they push us big time.
We get thrown all sorts of curve balls (mine came in the form of steep hills, I got lost 2 times, stray dogs everywhere that at one point came down the road to chase me, weird men trying to catch my attention which can be totally scary especially when you don’t speak the language! and something that, unfortunately, to this day, we women experience!), and we just gotta keep our cool and do the best we can.
If you never took a solo trip, I really encourage you to do it.
It will help build your confidence, you will feel super weird at first — I used to find eating alone weird and there was no one to take the damn photo but then you adjust.
And of course people asking you 24/7, are you travelling alone? Why?
But this happened more over here in Asia and not in Australia or other European countries, for example, where this is more normal, I think?!?
Anyway back to my life journey analogy.
I really contemplated on my little adventure all the similarities and found it oddly striking indeed (Am I the only one?)
The other one was the whole process.
At some point, downhill mostly, I was racing back and then I reminded myself to slow down and enjoy the process. But we also do so when we really know what we’re doing, or momentum keeps building and we speed madly through the process in our haste to get to the finish line. And sometimes this is a good thing.
Other times, when we’re really caught up in something that consumes our whole existence (work, challenging situations, difficult relationships, dark times), we forget to enjoy and appreciate the process, the “in between”, the being present, the messy middle. We just want it to be over as soon as possible.
There’s also a funny thing that happens during these types of trips in places that are quite unfamiliar, you don’t speak the language — your fear receptors spike even more, my amygdala was going nuts! It feels even more dangerous, where the heck are you, this is in the middle of nowhere, someone is gonna attack you — you know all those stories we play on repeat! And don’t get me wrong, sometimes fear is good and it keeps us alive (our clever brain didn’t keep this feature for no good reason!)
In this case, I took a deep breath and asked myself — if this was Romania or UK, would I still feel the same? Most likely not.
Okay so then calm down, keep pushing up that hill (or hold those breaks tight downhill) and enjoy your damn ride.
And just like life — the things that scare us, are what we should do because they help us build our character and confidence.
And you can’t do it without the courage to forge ahead.
Every time you feel lost or scared, trust that you’re with you and you can always find your way…always! even though it might take you longer or you might get lost on the way.
What have you been meaning to try but you’re scared to give it a go?
